Soul Healing Season
Recently, I have become more aware of my connection to nature and how it can impact my moods. And as I’ve matured into my healing journey, I’ve been encountering others who express a similar feeling. People I speak with through various workshops and webinars are aware of a certain sadness and depression as the weather turns cold and dark.
I want to say, first, that I am not a trained mental health expert and what I am about to talk it about is purely from my own perspective, my own lived experiences with depression and mental health issues.
I know depression. And it is hard to comprehend much less explain the effects of the condition to others when you're experiencing it. I wish to be clear that what I am about to talk about does not take away or negate others’ feelings and experiences; if anything, I think it's a way, as humans, that we can relate and feel connected not only to each other, but to our wise guide, Mother Nature.
In the midst of exploring all of this, the Winter Solstice came a few days ago, and our family and friends got together to celebrate this longest night. I reflected on the darkness and turned to Mother Nature to see where our disconnect, as humans, might be. I think it is clear to me that Nature is always striving for balance, and that the impacts of imbalance can vary greatly.
Once I started to allow healing to begin genuinely, I found myself returning to mimic and be aware of nature and what she was preparing us for and the subtle lessons we miss because of how modern society is structured.
As we are in our darkest period before December 25th, when the sun will begin to shine brighter and longer each day, I am again reflecting on lessons learned and feeling grateful for them.
Mother nature prepares us, if we allow it, to begin our grieving, reflection, power down, and release/replenish season long before it gets here. But we often miss this preparation. It can make the transition harder, and we fight what is natural and happening around us.
In the autumn, after our busy, social, warm, long days, we harvest and gather, just as nature begins this. We often forget or miss the grief lesson nature teaches us every year.
I started to notice this cycle in my own yard when the flower and vegetable gardens to wind down naturally. My wildflowers and an overrun yard of sunflowers began their transition from tracking the sun and shining bright to wilting, and losing their petals, once again gifting their seeds to the birds and eventually turning to husks of themselves.
The majestic, wise trees that give shade and calm begin to turn technicolor and give us the last beautiful composition to hold in our hearts before they, too, start to transition, wind down to restore themselves for all they do and share.
I am always crestfallen to see the leaves on the ground and trees barren, all the while knowing that without the leaves blanketing the yard and replenishing this soil that has become depleted by the growing season - having worked to give food, in various ways, to so many.
I am feeling grief in nature; I am allowing her to prepare me for what is coming.
The dark. The time for reflection. Grief; as I notice what is no longer in my life that had been or is in a different form than how it was or how I perceived or expected it to be.
Time to power down myself and allow for rest, release, and rejuvenation so that I may be replenished as we head into the longer days and rebirth of life.
I stop to ask myself what is good for me during this time. What celebration and seasonal festivities renew me, not deplete me or stress me out? I redefine what is right and good and natural for me, not what others tell me.
It creates a natural shift for me to be solid in my boundaries and give myself and my family what we need to recover and heal as the year comes to a close.
I feel less alone knowing that, at least on the northern half of the planet, all animals and elements of nature are experiencing and exhibiting the effects of this transition in ways true to the nature of each species and aspect of nature.
There is this preconceived notion that holidays are happy for all and that we all have so much to celebrate. While gratitude is vital for me, it goes against what my heart feels when I notice those "holes" in my life due to various endings as we gather and become enclosed with those we love.
Holidays can be challenging and stressful due to different enforced holiday traditions and the expectation to "OK" certain behaviors and people in our orbit that we usually would not allow. This seems to go against nature and the essence of oneself. So for me, when I began my healing journey, I chose to get back to balance.
Allowing myself to feel the dark, to grieve, power down, be reflective, grateful, and to release, and renew has changed and improved so many aspects of my life. It has allowed me to find and embrace the winter spirit in a new way.
Light and warmth will return. Growth and beauty can come in so many forms. Replenishment is vital to continue development and keep harmony.
This time is now my soul-healing season. I scan my heart and head because science shows us that neurons operate separately and differently, so we can't truly heal until both body and mind are healed. It’s the only way to release trauma in all its forms.
If I don't allow myself this dark season for all of this and the replenishment of body and mind, it's hard to thrive.
Once again, during this dark, rich season, I am in awe of the incredible guide we have that delivers life and lessons if we "Turn on, tune in, turn off" and hold the space for the dark to give us what we need.
